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Crying into the Saucepan Hayes, Nikki

ISBN: 9781781174999

‘A brutally honest and courageous account of living with mental illness – truly inspiring’

– Louis Walsh

‘There are people out there who will no longer feel alone after reading Nikki’s story’

-Markus Feehily

Well-known DJ Nikki Hayes has lived most of her life with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), a serious mental disorder marked by a pattern of on-going instability in mood, behaviour, self-image and functioning. BPD is also associated with severe functional impairment and high rates of suicide. Nikki should have been diagnosed aged fifteen the first time she came in contact with the mental health services with anorexia, or aged nineteen, after an attempted suicide; or aged twenty-eight following a breakdown after her father’s death, and if not then aged thirty-four when she was diagnosed with post-natal depression. Instead, each time she was given a different diagnosis, none fully explaining her symptoms or actions. Nikki believes her illness went undetected for so long because a lot of how she was feeling and acting was easily explained away by lumping it under the umbrella term of ‘depression’, or, by simply attributing it to attention seeking or just being a little out of control. By sharing her story Nikki hopes to help others see that they are not alone and encourage greater support for people suffering with mental health issues in Ireland. #StrongerTogether

  • Crying into the Saucepan

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